The second weekend of the 2019 Calgary Stampede, I headed into the city with some mates for a Stampede overnighter. The morning after, we checked-out of the hotel and my friends hit the road to head back to ‘the lake’ (aka Lake Louise); I opted to stay in Calgary for an extra couple nights to soak in the ‘city living’ vibe for a bit longer.

After bidding my friends adieu, I made my way to the Calgary City HI Hostel, which would become my ‘landing pad’ for the next two nights. After taking a rather lengthy nap and chugging some Gatorade (Stampede – 1, Lindsay – 0), I made myself presentable and headed downtown, armed with my laptop and headphones. I did a bit of window shopping with a cup of tea, before deciding to go to a spot on Stephen Avenue called Local, as it was a venue I hadn’t hit up before and typically advertised solid drink-and-snacks specials.

As soon as I walked in, I found myself a corner seat at the bar, sat down, and whipped out my laptop. After receiving my soda water, pint, and fries, a gentleman (maybe early-to-mid 70s) seated two-away-on-my-left (but on the other edge of the square bar, if that makes sense) apologized for disrupting me, before pointing at my laptop and asking what it was. I assured him that he probably knew what it was. He guessed that it was a computer and I replied with “see, you knew all along!”. He then asked “what do we call it?”; I told him that it was referred to as a “laptop”. He proceeded to ask me additional questions about what I was doing with it and what laptops are typically used for. I patiently answered his questions and had a brief conversation about computers and ‘today’s technology’. As we chatted, a young guy (maybe early-to-mid 20s?) reclaimed a vacant seat that had a jacket on it two-down-to-my-right. In my peripheral vision, I could tell that the younger guy was tuned in to the conversation, as I described the utility and functionality of laptops and computers to the older guy; eventually, the conversation dissipated and I went back to my laptop-ing.

After a couple of quiet minutes, the older gentleman pulled out a pack of cigarettes, removed one, and threw it at the young guy to my right, as if he was playing darts (he held it up to his eye and aimed…literally like he was playing darts). The cigarette whizzed over my laptop and hit the young guy’s chest, before falling to the ground. I assumed that I was about to witness either a) some sort of heated exchange of words or b) someone get kicked out. BUT instead, the younger guy picked up the cigarette, turned to me, and commented that “Richard” was “the greatest guy” he knew. In that moment, I learned that the older guy was named Richard.

To paint a slightly clearer picture of Richard, I’m going to venture the guess that he was about 5’7″. He had shaggy grey hair that was in disarray and fell a little above his ears. He was wearing a baggy-ish, faded-brown, long-sleeve button down top and faded black trousers. He had grey-blue eyes and his face was lean, weathered, and really kind-looking (make of that what you will).

Richard and the younger dude headed out for a smoke and the younger guy returned about 10 minutes later. Richard eventually reappeared about 20 minutes after that, chatting with some guy that I assumed he’d encountered during his smoke break. I’d peg this new character to have been in his early-20s. The new young dude was lean, wearing a black t-shirt and dark jeans, and had shaggy black hair. He was also toting a black backpack with red piping and was wearing scuffed up grey converse sneakers. I think he might have also been wearing black-framed glasses…don’t quote me, though, my memory and notes aren’t clear on that.

This quickly became the best part of my evening.

As Richard took his seat, he chatted with the new guy and removed a stack of pages from the worn-looking black leather folder he’d had placed in front of him since I’d arrived. The young guy stood next to Richard, as he placed the stack on the counter and excitedly fanned out several pages of artwork. I’m no artist but, as I was being low-key nosey and slyly glancing over, they looked like charcoal sketches. Richard started with the drawing at the top of the fan. He began pointing at different spots on the sketch and I could hear snippets of him explaining the techniques he’d used when completing the piece. As Richard spoke, the younger guy nodded thoughtfully and offered numerous accolades for Richard’s artwork. Richard went through a few of his sketches in this fashion, explaining how he’d approached each project. The younger guy leaned over and enthusiastically, but carefully, looked through Richard’s collection, while asking a series of questions about the inspiration for each piece.

Richard proceeded to share stories about his artwork with the younger guy and I heard the younger gent interjecting with praises for Richard’s artistic talent. In response to one such praise, Richard straightened his posture and proudly stated “well thank you, I’m an artist”. The smile on Richard’s face was hard to miss and you could see the pride beaming off of him. The younger guy continued to admire Richard’s work, while being visibly cognizant of not wanting to damage it, and asked questions about Richard’s upbringing and journey as an artist. He listened intently as Richard talked about each piece. I heard Richard telling the guy about one of his pieces that was inspired by an ex-wife, with whom he’d had a “turbulent, but beautiful, relationship”. He spoke about his upbringing, his commitment to Judaism, and the differences he’d observed between people in Canada and people he’d known while growing up in Israel. He explained that one of the pieces he had in front of him was inspired by a boy he’d known who was drafted at the age of twelve. Richard told the young guy about his thoughts on the military in Israel and the forces in Canada.

After listening to Richard for a while, the younger guy paused for a moment, before pensively stating that Richard had clearly been through a lot in his life. The young guy shook Richard’s hand and thanked him for being open to sharing his stories. He said he loved Richard’s art, in addition to the kind of person he was learning Richard to be. He asked if he could take a photo of one of the art pieces and asked for Richard’s email address, so he could reach out to potentially purchase one of Richard’s drawings in the future.

After the young guy entered Richard’s email address into his phone, Richard thanked him for his praise. For whatever reason, Richard then shifted his focus to me, as I was intently typing away (mostly notes for this post like the creep that I am). Richard asked if I was a writer. Before I could even answer him, he swatted the younger guy’s arm and asked “doesn’t she look like a writer?!”. I laughed and asked what exactly about my appearance exuded ‘writer’. Richard said that, in addition to my comfy attire (I wear flannel a lot, sue me), there was something about my demeanour and the look of focus on my face as I typed that gave him the impression that I “must be a writer”. I laughed again, said “if you say so”, and explained that I enjoy taking my laptop and headphones with me to do work in lively spots. In response, Richard said he loved that I was there that evening to ‘zone out’ with my laptop. He commented that “you don’t see that kind of thing too often anymore” (referring to people in a lively space, by themselves, enjoying a solitary hobby); ironically, this is what I had first noticed about Richard and it really struck a chord with me when he pointed out his own observations about my presence at Local that evening.

The young guy shook Richard’s hand again and headed out. Richard and I exchanged sentiments about hoping the other enjoyed the rest of their evening. Richard went back to sketching. I went back to laptop-ing.

So what, you may ask, did I love about this night? What prompted me to take notes, so I could accurately share the evening’s events in a blog post? Well, I’ll tell you.

That night, I had the opportunity to see people connect, despite the fact that they appeared to have several differences between them (age and generation, hometown, stage in life, possibly different hobbies and interests). Based on my hawklike powers of observation, my take was that they were able to connect because (at least in that instance) they shared a nonjudgemental vibe and were interested in learning about each other. No one was in a playpen, no one was being forced to have a chat, no one was unable to excuse themselves and shy away from the conversation; they were both legitimately open to having an unexpected conversation with new acquaintances. I loved seeing people from different generations be enthusiastic to learn about one another’s experiences and perspectives. I loved that the younger guy took the time to appreciate and learn about Richard’s artwork, which was something that Richard was clearly very proud of. I think there are so many people who are extremely talented and it goes unnoticed far too often, so that was particularly heart-warming to see. In such a busy world, where everyone has their own priorities, schedules, and goals in life, it was wonderful to be in the orbit of these individuals, as they hit the ‘pause button’ and took a few minutes out of their evening to have a genuine and inquisitive chat; it’s not something that I see all that often.

I was also stoked to briefly participate in that connectivity.

I can’t count the number of people that I’ve met over the years, many of whom have been from completely different walks of life, where I learned something new about anything from their hometown or profession to their favourite charity or off-the-beaten-path hiking recommendation. In every single instance, meeting these new characters wouldn’t have been possible if I hadn’t been open to pausing what I was doing and engaging with someone who started talking to me.

I admit that I was apprehensive about opening the floor to having conversations that night; sometimes I shut it down right away, as I’m not always feeling up to potentially having to navigate an awkward situation (you can ask my friends- I don’t know if there’s a magnet in me, but I am randomly and inexplicably approached by people who want to share their equally-random thoughts quite frequently). With that being said, I’m so glad that I took my headphones out when Richard started asking about my laptop.

At first glance, Richard, the young artwork-praising guy, and I didn’t have much in common. On the other hand, what all three of us shared was an appreciation for learning about other people, their experiences, and their perspectives; sometimes, that open-mindedness is all it takes to turn a routine ‘laptop-ing’ session into a unique memory for the books.